How to Get Someone to Fall in Love with You (100% Guarantee)©

Whether you're new to the dating game or trying to rekindle a flame with your spouse, these tips and tricks will ensure YOU and your lover end up together. I would know. I've never been in a successful relationship, so obviously, I know what I'm talking about!

Tip #1:

Don't break eye contact.

Eye contact proves that you are human (or so I have been told).

Tip #2:

If you talk about your childhood, you'll have the person you're trying to woo eating out of the palm of your hand.

Tip #3:

If you're noticing a rut in your marriage, try seeing other people and guess what you'll learn? That no one else wants to put up with your obnoxious habits either. Sometimes the grass isn't greener on the other side.

Trick #1:

If you are making out with someone you've just started seeing, sometimes it's fun to say cute things like, "If only my mom could see me now," or "I think I'm falling in love with you" to see how they'll respond. (This is a trick I like to use, and it has a 85% return rate, which according to my calculations, only makes sense in my head.)

Trick #2:

Take them to Applebee's.

Tick #3:

This is something I love doing. (She's never done it.) I like going dancing and when the guy I'm with least suspects it, I spin him around and then throw him into the air like the celebrities do on Dancing with the Stars. (She can't do that.) Guyz love it. (She wouldn't know.)

Trick #4:

This is the oldest trick in the book. My mom used to tell me this every day before sending me off to school. Don't be yourself. Under no circumstances should you be yourself.

That's it, folks. It's short and simple. Try these few things out. Let me know how they work for you.